Another post highlighting and analysing cohesive devices in academic writing, this time a summary of research looking into the facial expressions of animals.
In this post we look at some cohesive devices used in a recent news report covering the unrest in Hong Kong.
Living far away from home improves their ability in money managing, since their parents may not support their financial.
Unfortunately the use of ‘financial’ here lacks coherence because the Indonesian version of ‘financial’ – finansial – is used informally as a noun, whereas in English it is always an adjective. The reader is left wondering.. financial what?
The following alternatives use different word forms and also include strong collocation:
- ..their parents may not cover their financial commitments. (adjective affects and collocates with commitments)
- ..their parents may not support them financially. (adverb affects and collocates with support)
- ..their parents may not cover their finances. (noun collocates with cover)
The only other example I can think of in which an imported adjective is used as a noun, might be:
- Taking drugs is not good for your mental.
..which should read:
- Taking drugs is not good for your mental health.
If you can think of any other words that get lost in translation in the same way, please comment below this post!
English should be taught from an early age. English is highly valued when pursuing study abroad, getting a job, and connecting business people all over the world. They use English, furthermore, in their activities, such as education, business, politics, travel, and others.
The IELTS examiner will be wondering who they refers to. In IELTS terms, the plural they and the singular it refer to or act as substitutes for the subject of the previous sentence. Referencing and substitution is something that the IELTS examiner is evaluating in your writing, so it pays to use it correctly.
Let’s investigate what this writer is trying to say: Continue reading
The word ‘trend‘ is only used once, and even then it is used together with ‘downward‘! See this post for further discussion of ‘trend‘.
Although is used to contrast two trends at the same time. This is a good thing to do, if you can, in your IELTS Task 1 overview.
Indonesians notice the contrasted items are separated with a comma without ‘but’ (akan tetapi).
- Although female-dominated industries have suffered fewer job losses from globalisation and technological change, they also pay less.
Referencing and substitution
- This form of segregation.. (= men and women pursue different lines of work)
- ..those that have long employed women.. (those = ‘the fastest growing industries in America)
- This does not mean.. (This = slow growth of sectors dominated by men)
- ..they also pay less. (they = slow growth of sectors dominated by men)
- ..the figure (= % of American doctors and lawyers who are women)
- ..this process takes time (= changing male and female roles in the workplace)
- At this rate.. (= the rate at which full gender equality is to be achieved)
Vocabulary (Lexical Resource)
- pursue (v) + lines of work (n)
- segregation (n) – in this case male / female
- better off (adj) – comparative form of well-off (wealthy)
- capture (v) + jobs (n)
- mere (adj) – to emphasise a low figure
- gender (adj) + parity (n) – sophisticated synonym for gender equality
- the field – the work field (Make sure you establish a context before reducing a phrase like this!)
- Men and women often pursue different lines of work.
- ..many sectors…have grown much more slowly..
- ..the field will not achieve gender parity for another 200 years.
- In the 1960s, less than 10% of American doctors and lawyers were women.
- Today over 60% of chefs and cooks are men.
- ..a mere 10% of all nursing jobs.
- Today, women graduate from university at higher rates than men, putting them in a stronger position for many well-paid professional jobs that were once male-dominated.
Teachers should shift from individual learning to collaborative one.
Here an Indonesian student is translating ‘yang‘ as a substitute for a noun, but running into trouble because ‘learning‘ is uncountable.
This is easy to solve by converting ‘individual learning‘ into a countable noun:
- Teachers should shift from an individual learning style to a collaborative one.
Notice, too that the same kind of translation is possible with plural count nouns:
- Collaborative tasks are better than individual ones.
However, this is rather informal and is used more in speaking than in writing.